Earlier this month we discussed Self-Mastery and how by resonating at a high frequency of energy (more on that coming soon!), we attract what we want into our lives with little or no effort.

What holds us back from living the lives we desire?

Some people attribute the lack of having what they want to fate – that their lives are somehow “meant to be” the way they are. Many people don’t like the concept of fate, however, because it negates free will. But what if neither the traditional concept of fate, nor free will, really existed for most people? I’ve been curious about these things all my life, and when I learned about Energy Leadership by Bruce Schneider, I realized that an unusual concept called self-fate helps explain why so many of us don’t have what we really want.

Self-fate is the idea that because our past is dominating our thought processes, and because most people are not consciously living in the moment, our past actually creates our future. Because we are making choices based on our past experiences, we cannot change our future unless the control of the past is removed, and we choose to live in the now. If you’ve been following me for a while, you’ll know that living mindfully is one of actions I take regularly to help me stay out of the past and focus on making THIS MOMENT the most powerful and energetic it can be. You can find some of my mindfulness blogs here.

So self-fate really means that for most of us, it is us who create our fate because we are imprisoned by the past. We have pre-determined choices that we are programmed to make, and our past does the programming for us. Yikes! Living in the moment…living consciously is the first step to correcting this. In fact, in this powerful moment, you can consciously decide to direct your fate NOT by the past, but by your conscious choices (yes, as opposed to subconscious choices!).

Many of us know this woman, and some of may have been this woman (or man)…

Think about a woman who is unhappy with her relationships and says that she seems to meet the same kind of men over and over again. She complains that men are all the same, looking for the same thing. She believes that she’s never going to find a relationship that is mutually respectful and serving, as opposed to the relationships she’s had, where she’s been emotionally abused. It’s no wonder she feels this way, as she’s had many experiences that have created those beliefs. In fact, it’s quite normal that she believes what she does, which poses a real challenge – since she sees men as disrespectful, abusive and manipulating, she is putting out “victim” energy. She is being a victim to the beliefs she has. And what is the result of that? The vibration she emits is picked up by those whose energy matches those beliefs: men who take advantage of her. To them, she’s an easy target. And so, she actually creates her future relationships, and will continue to do so unless she changes her sense of self, or, who she is BEING, in relationships.

So while aspects of our lives may very well be pre-determined, let’s recognize that there are many things in our lives that we can control, and one of those is how aware we are of what from our past we are allowing to re-create itself in our present. Have you caught yourself saying, “Well, of course that’s going to happen!” Guess what? You just confirmed that it will continue to happen! Make sense?

Be mindful. Listen to what your thinking and saying for clues. Your fate is very well in your hands. How will you guide it?

In October, we’ll dive more into our energy, what that really means, and how it is one of the most powerful tools at our disposal to direct our self-fate, and our self-mastery.

It’s your life, lead it well.


Monique Reneé Catoggio