Be Still

January 24, 2013



I’m reading a book that a great friend of mine gave me over the holidays called What Got You Here Won’t Get You There, by Marshall Goldsmith.  In a nutshell it discusses the 20 habits that successful people should break in order to “get there”…that “next big thing” we are all looking for. I’m only on Part 1, but already I’m having tons of “aha” moments, not only for myself but for others who I’m coaching and mentoring.

One recent conversation comes to mind as I read about what Goldsmith calls the Natural Law. He shares,

 This is the natural law. Every choice, big or small, is a risk-reward decision where your bottom-line thinking is, “What’s in it for me?”

He also states,

 People will do something–including changing their behavior–only if it can be demonstrated that doing so is in their own best interests as defined by their own values.

So in my recent conversation, my client describes that she is struggling with a deep desire to do nothing…to be still. Doing nothing, for her, feels like staying in bed when she could be working or making things happen, not putting so much importance on doing what is necessary to advance in her career, and not coming to the rescue each time a family members needs saving. But, as Goldsmith explains above and in more detail in the book, this is not an easy thing to do, because for my client, allowing herself to do nothing means she will be going against some of her deeply held values and the Success Belief  Goldsmith calls, “I Choose to Succeed”.

Maybe this is true for you too, as it also is for me. If this happens to be one of your success beliefs, choosing to NOT succeed can feel horrible! You feel like a fish out of water…a boxer with no opponent. When it comes to success in our career, especially, we can play this recording in our head over and over again:

I can’t rest…I can’t not do nothing! If I don’t keep working hard and succeeding I may not move ahead! John (or Jane!) may steal my spotlight and I will miss out on new opportunities!

Sound familiar?

In this case, my client is feeling un-natural, because her natural state as well as many of her values are ones that may feel opposed to what her mind, body and soul may be needing right now in her life. Goldsmith discusses the importance of recognizing this natural law and our success habits, which sometimes DO need to be broken in order for us to truly get to where we need to go in our career an in our life.

Because I also study, practice and coach around the laws of energy and the energetic cycles we all go through (study of Chinese face reading/9 Star Ki), I also happen to believe and know that there are specific periods in our lives which require that we allow ourselves to rest, renew, and not push forward and achieve as greatly as we normally would. To do so, in fact, would be to go against the energy of that year.  It’s okay (and really great!) sometimes to DREAM instead of DO, STUDY instead of IMPLEMENT, WALK instead RUN, etc. It just so happens, that my client is heading into that exact cycle of energy right now in her life (unique for each individual). So, what she is feeling she needs to do right now is right on. By allowing these new habits to manifest she will be honoring herself and setting the stage for continued success in her life.

Life and where we drive it truly comes down to the patterns we create through our beliefs and habits. Goldsmith does a great job of helping us recognize many of those beliefs we subscribe to which will sit in our subconscious until we become aware and use this new knowledge to help us create positive change and set forth on a new success plan to get us where we want to go.

Thanks, David, for the book! I’m moving to Part 2 and  have an inkling I’ll love it!

Interested in knowing the energy of this year for you? Write to me: enpointecoach@gmail.com.

Namaste, Monique

The holiday season is special. It is a time for all of us to create a space for our children, family, friends (and us parents too!) to step outside of ourselves and our lives to tap into the wonder of the amazing lives we are leading. Truly…is it not a miracle in and of itself that we are on this earth breathing? Yes, take that deep breath!

In preparation for a joyous, sacred and stress-free holiday season, join me and two other AMAZING, women (see below) at The Nest in Coral Gables, on Saturday, November 3rd, 2:30 pm, to help you set the stage for a magical holiday season.

So, save the date now!

Listen to my dear friend, Lina Acosta, program director of The Nest, describe this very special event coming very soon.

On this day I will share with you how to:

  • “Friend” your energy so you can BE your ideal parent and professional
  • Understand your unique stress tendencies by looking at your face (and the faces of your children and relatives!) That’s right!!
  • Use a simple 3 step process to shift to a happy, stress-free state

I’m so lucky to share this time two talented practitioners, Michelle Alva and Alexis Edwards!

Integrative and Holistic Practitioner Michelle Alva, PT will present different ways to avoid low back and neck tension which are very common during the Holidays. She will also introduce a great way to de-stress and get fit called Awaken To U Yoga class which will be held on Thursdays at 7pm at The Nest.

Alexis Edwards, Acupuncture Physician will discuss the benefits of using laser instead of needles for children and discuss the benefits of using Chinese Herbs for various stress-related ailments.

We’re always present for others, especially during the holidays. Use this special occasion for some YOU time and get ready and psyched for one of the best times of the year.

Hope to see you there.


In the latest issue of O Magazine, Oprah shares:

“I believe that each of us has an essence, a quality at the very core of our being that makes us who we are. It’s what guides our thoughts, our feelings, our tastes. It’s what sets us apart from everyone else. And I believe that finding ways to express that essence is one of the greatest joys in life.”

What if I could share with you a way that you can pinpoint this “essence” — yours and that of the special people in your life?

What if you could understand someone deeply simply by looking at their face?

If you are intrigued, then you’re reading the right post! In fact, I was intrigued about a year ago when I met Jean Haner, author of The Wisdom of Your Face and The Wisdom of Your Child’s Face.   You see as a mother I always longed to confirm what I thought I knew about my children that no teacher could come to understand. As early as pre-k our children are already being labeled and treated a certain way–many times in ways that drown their curiosity, joy, and intelligence. Their true nature–what they are excited to share with the world– can be interpreted as  something bad that must be hidden or fixed.

Jean opened my eyes to an incredible science that validates who we are to are very core and helps us to understand our strengths, struggles, and purpose in our lifetime. I’m thrilled to both have her as a mentor and to be her student.

The Wisdom of Your Face speaks to an ancient branch of Chinese medicine which teaches that we were born with a unique blueprint that is ours alone, and that this inner architecture is reflected in our outer design–the features of our face. This science provides us with an incredible tool. With this tool we can breathe easier, look in the mirror and say, “I’m so proud to be me….I love my face!!”

The link above to Jean’s website provides A LOT of research and information that you’ll love to read to learn more. Jean also offers workshops all over the country. 

I’m happy to be interning with Jean in her practitioner program. As part of this process I will be conducting both mini-readings and in-depth case studies. 

During a full-length consultation (60-90 minutes) you also may bring photos of a loved one or colleague to be read as well, as time allows. 

Note: Children can be “read” but the consultation will be with the parent(s) using photos.

If you would like to learn more about these readings, or if you’d like to recommend someone who may be interested,  please complete the form below and/or forward along this post. I’m seeking 10 case study participants between now and September. 

I can share with you that this knowledge and practice has allowed me to better understand myself, others who I interact with everyday, and appreciate what we all have to offer the world and each other.

I’m looking forward to sharing more with you along the way and to hearing from you soon.

Honoring you and your inner architecture,


Lovely Scars

June 14, 2011

I read this today and all sorts of thoughts began popping up in my mind as well as some scary, albeit meaningful memories:

Effort is an expression of a deep desire in the soul. It is part of our process in this lifetime. We do not ride a bike the first time we try, and the same principle applies to our spiritual growth.

I’ll say! My first memory is just that…riding a bike. I absolutely loved my black and pink Huffy! Problem: learning to ride it truly was not easy and I have a scar to prove it. It just so happens that I fell off my Huffy into a pile of glass on the street which resulted in quite a bit of blood and a nasty scar on my right thigh. A second incident even earlier on (about 4-years-old) was from scaling a wall and trying to scoot myself from one side of a tall window to the other. Problem: I fell on a lovely, regal Spanish chair adorned by a metal peak. Ouch! You know how this ended…another scar. This experience, however, was even more memorable as it occurred during the Super Bowl. All of the surgeons at the hospital must have been watching the Bowl, since my father helped stitch me up in the ER!

What was similar about these two painful moments was the fact that they indeed resulted from a deep desire and effort. I’m damn proud of my scars!! I recall that small window now as an adult, and say to myself  “No big deal.” But as a 4-year-old that was a ginormous window and challenge. How cool for me to be able to get across! I was in another world in that moment, in a 4-year-old fantasy land, mimicking Super Woman! Yep, I love my scar!

And my Huffy…that beautiful, tough Huffy, signified personal power, freedom and adventure! I explored many a neighborhood on that bike and found some creative sanctuaries along the way, like my favorite place I called “Paradise”, my own little spot under a bridge by a canal close by.  Many of my childhood soul desires were dreamed-up there.

According to Chinese Face Reading, an ancient form of Chinese Medicine, which I’m currently studying, thanks to the amazing Jean Haner, every single scar, discoloration, wrinkle, etc., on our faces reveals the specific challenges we are put on this earth to experience and learn from. All of them come from a deep place, and because they are all part of our earthly transformation, through our awareness of them we can grow in wisdom, self-compassion and self-acceptance. We also learn how to have compassion for others and accept them for who they are. Although the scars I’ve described above are not on my face, I’ve grown to appreciate my facial features and wrinkles (yay!) because I know they carry a deeper meaning. They represent ME and MY STORY! They also give me a clear picture of what lessons I still have to learn.

What scars (visible or not) on or within you represent these important moments of effort and deep desire?

How have they helped you grow and transform?

Not sure how to identify those “scars” that provide us with those “spirit expanding”  experiences? Try this. If you can answer “True” to any of these statements, you’ve got yourself a winner:

  1. This feels just like learning to ride a bike! It takes so many tries and so much effort to get there. I don’t know if I can do it!
  2. This situation or ones similar just keep coming up for me over and over.  It’s like Murphy’s Law!
  3. This feels familiar, yet I’m ready to not re-live this. I’m ready to step over this invisible line I’ve drawn and say “No” this time.
  4. This comes up not only for me but for those close to me!
  5. I’m so darn excited! It’s like I’m in the flow and things are just magically happening! This is a sweet feeling!

Are you beginning to notice what those Lovely Scars or deep desires may look like for you?

Be curious. Look at your past and present experiences, and future desires for clues. The more you pay attention the more a pattern will become clear, making your spiritual journey so much more meaningful.

I’d love for you to share some of your Lovely Scars…I hope you do.