Tech-NOTORIOUS!
November 9, 2009
Sitting at home for two days this week, helping my children heal from their colds, I found myself thinking about productivity…or the lack there of it (for me)!!
Especially for those of us who have children, or care for a sick or aging relative, it seems difficult at times to be consistent about reaching our goals and being as productive as we set out to be. Our perfectly planned days are thrown for a loop, and we (and those around us) must just deal with it. Energetically speaking, when this happens, we tend to work from our lower levels of energy (victimhood and conflict), because we feel at the effect of life.
These days, flexibility and adaptability are skills we all can maximize to help us manage the constant change we live with. The more I thought of it, the more excited I became in finding some solutions to help me manage my life in spite of my life!
So how could I be more flexible and adaptable? My mind immediately jumped to my “Wheel of Life” that I use to measure my satisfaction with certain areas of my life. Some of these include: Productivity, Creativity & Problem Solving, Influencing & Inspiring Others, Health & Wellness, Time Management & Balance, Family & Parenting, Spiritual Awareness, and Fun & Enjoyment. I questioned further, what could I do when life says, “Not today, Monique! Change your plans!” How could I keep my life in motion without too much stopping and re-directing?
Then, a light bulb went off! “iPhone applications”, my mind told me! Sure, I’ve experimented with some fun applications, but what would happen if I—with intention—search for applications that are free or inexpensive which can help me work with my Wheel of Life, despite “life”?
The fun began! I was like a kid in a candy shop. I’m not quite finished yet, but here’s the beginning of a “techie” system to help me stay on track. I downloaded and/or purchased the following “apps” which correspond to one or more areas in my Wheel of Life:
| Application | Wheel of Life Area | Intended Uses |
| Lock Box | Productivity | I finally have a place for all my passwords, especially for use out of the office. |
| Toodledo | Productivity/Time Management | For those of us who use the GTD (Getting Things Done method). Great for managing projects. |
| FastShop | Productivity/Family & Parenting | Holds all of my lists (grocery, drug store, holiday and birthday shopping). |
| My Thoughts+ | Balance/Spirituality | I’ve created my very own affirmation slideshow with music. Keeps my vision close to me. |
| Ask | Inspiring Others /Spirituality | My daily dose of spiritual principals for myself and to inspire others. |
| MyDiary | Creativity & Problem Solving | The journal that I will use to summarize my day’s “aha” moments. |
| IdeaOrganizer | Creativity & Problem Solving | I live off of ideas! Here’s where I can track them all, with voice notes, photos, etc.! |
| Personal Assistant | Productivity & (Financial) Balance | Keeps my accounts up-to-date and at my finger tips, all in one place. |
| SixPackYoga | Health & Wellness | Need I say more?? Yoga for my abs, anytime, anywhere, and for as long as I’d like! |
| YogaStretch | Health & Wellness | Customized yoga programs with an instructor, music, and all! |
| NaturalCures | Health & Wellness/Parenting | A quick resource for at home and natural remedies. |
Ideally, I’d be doing yoga at a studio, speaking to my health coach or doctor every time I had a health question, carry my journal with me wherever I go (as well as my project folders, grocery lists, daily planner, spiritual resources, affirmation index cards, vision boards, etc.). What a heavy bag that would be!! You get my drift, right? My iPhone is always with me, so I might as well take full advantage of it and make sure it supports my needs to help keep my Wheel of Life on its path.
I’ve just lightened my load tremendously, and given myself permission to be more flexible and adaptable (and more productive!). Essentially, I’ve made myself Tech-NOTORIOUS!
I would love to hear your ideas about using technology (or not!) to help you achieve your goals. What works for you that you can share with Being En Pointe readers? I hope you will share and experiment.
TECH it on!
Your Top Ten
September 26, 2009
Your Top Ten: Principals that guide your life—your thoughts and actions.
When life throws you lemons, don’t even bother to squeeze them and make lemonade, just put on your armor and deflect them immediately, moving onto the next opportunity in your life. Let me suggest a vision of armor that is never removed from your body, but is a part of you—a flexible shield that cannot be detached and simply serves to bounce things off you that do not nourish, sustain or help you excel in any way.
How do you create your armor? An enjoyable way is to produce your Top 10 Principals list. It’s almost like your personal Ten Commandments. How do you begin to build this list, you ask? One way is to take some time and think about those things that have easily penetrated your armor. They caused you to get angry, dwell in depression for too long, or act in ways that are the antithesis of your being.
Here are a few examples…
- Let’s say you are a very competitive person and you happen to get down on yourself when others in your team achieve success and recognition more quickly than you do. A powerful principle that you can adopt (which I absolutely love and use for myself) is: “I am Always, and in All Ways, better than I think I am.” By employing this principal each time a situation like this comes up, you will be more inclined to (before and after as well) focus on your own initiatives and your own success. It also will most likely be easier for you to be genuinely happy for the success of your co-worker and take that opportunity to learn something from his/her achievement.
- Let’s use another work example. You are completely overwhelmed! And, each time your boss or someone else asks you to tackle another project or task it adds a new level of stress to your day. If one of your principals is: “I am in complete control of my schedule and my life.” How do you think you’d feel then if caught in this scenario? How much less anxious would you be?
- Finally, let’s use one that many individuals without a job right now may be experiencing. You are an established professional with much to offer any organization. In fact, your skills are as such that you may be able to work in a different industry or position because your skills are transferable. However, it’s been months and you just can’t land a job. You have given up and you just don’t believe in your abilities or yourself at this point. How about if this were your principal: “I have everything within me that I need to be successful, and the universe/God, etc., brings me the assistance I need at the precise moment I need it.” Did your spirit lift just now after reading this? Mine sure did!
So, by now, you should get a clear idea of what a principal can be for you. It can feel like a value (integrity, trust, patience, etc.), an affirmation (like example 1), or it can be a Universal Truth (whatever that may be for you—like one of the Ten Commandments). There are no rules. These are yours and you can create them as you like.
I’m not going to say that creating your 10 will be easy. In fact, it shouldn’t be. You must get to a point that you know yourself SO WELL that there is no question that you desire to live your life by these principals.
Who are you and what do you live by? Who do you most desire to be? What are you waiting for to begin living in this fashion—with such resilience that those around you have no choice but to feel, see, hear the difference? Wow, that’s exciting!
I was flipping through O’s Big Book of Happiness, and I read Oprah’s “What I know for sure”, when she was describing how embarrassed and betrayed she felt when one of her family members sold her “secret” of abuse and pregnancy to the National Enquirer. She felt like the entire world would see her in a different way, that she would no longer be respected. It was one of her principals, however, that got her out of this black hole, the one that states— “When you know who you are and what you stand for, you stand in wisdom.”
Know yourself.
Know what you stand for.
Be enlightened, and light the way for yourself and others.
Create your Top Ten, read them daily, and stand in wisdom.
Vision Quest
August 31, 2009
I was channel surfing yesterday and came across an old 80’s flick you may remember—Vision Quest. If you’re my age—let’s just say “in the late 30’s”— and you are a female, chances are you will definitely remember this movie, since Madonna had a cameo in it as a bar performer, singing her hit love song, “Crazy for You.” I think I was around 13 or 14 when that song and movie came out, and who didn’t have a crazy crush at that age, right? So, when I first watched Vision Quest, the thing I remembered most about the movie was the love story…the crush…the first love.
When I saw it this time, however, my perspective was completely different. What caught my attention was this 18 year old’s insatiable quest for success—his relentless pursuit for excellence. His belief in himself and in his capabilities was un-matched; his excitement was so high it was untouchable. Simply put, his vision was focused, powerful and tangible.
We all have goals. Perhaps not all of them are at the forefront of our mind and of our lives, but what if at least one of them was, just as it was for the young man in the movie? How would achieving just one major goal change your life?
Author Jack Canfield—“America’s Success Coach” believes that it is essential to have a Breakthrough Goal. This is not just any goal, this is a goal that, if accomplished, will “represent a quantum leap for you,” not just an incremental improvement. Within our team at the office we are focusing on goal-setting and achievement as well as the identification of at least one breakthrough goal. Why? It’s so easy to set goals that are reachable, especially those that are expected of us in some capacity, either at work or at home. I bet one of these goals will come to mind for you right now as one did for me. However, it’s usually those things that we truly want to achieve, dreams we want to breathe life into, which we shy away from. These goals make us work so much harder than we are used to and show the world (especially ourselves!) what we’re made of. These are the goals that allow us to shift our paradigms, re-define ourselves, and shout out, “Wow, I really can do this!”
The best part about the movie was how by having a vision and sticking to it, the character inspired so many around him as well—his classmate who was abused by his father, the local chef who never had the chance to do what he dreamed of, the older girl—his first love—who was lost and hated the world, and his grandfather, who felt hope again after experiencing his grandson’s determination and achievement. He actually inspired his entire town. He was a beacon of light and hope.
You see, when we witness the achievement of breakthrough goals by others, we are inspired, even if only for a moment, to do something extraordinary with our lives; to take a risk, push harder than ever, and stay the course. How can we extend that moment long enough to help us create our own breakthrough moment? I’d love for you to ponder this question with me this month.
How crazy are you for a breakthrough? I’m ready for my vision quest! Are you?
Got solution? No problem!
August 1, 2009
I’ve always been a big fan of strengths-based leadership and personal development. It just makes sense to me. I was speaking with a student last week who was challenged with finding what it took within her to buckle down and study for a math exam she absolutely needed to ace, despite her lack-luster interest in math. Sound familiar? Well, it did to me. I resonated with her story. Although I was very good at math and enjoyed the challenge during a particular time in my life (10th & 11th grade) when I was very focused and desired to be a “great” student, I understood deeply that it just wasn’t “my thing”. My strengths were always in the areas of communication and expression, whether it be dancing, singing, broadcasting, writing, etc. Yet, while it may always be worth our while to place most of our energy into our areas of strengths, sometimes we do have work in and around these challenging areas. We need to do just enough to get through or by them. And, interestingly enough, many times our strengths are what we need to rely on to help us pull through our weaknesses.
This week when I received one of my daily kabbalah tune up messages, I was reminded of how looking at solutions vs. problems can be similarly challenging. Here’s what the tune up said:
“The solution exists before the problem. This is a kabbalistic truth that saves a lot of worrying. So often in life we freak out because we don’t think there is an answer, a cure, a way out. We needn’t worry. It’s there. We just need to find it….answers come from unexpected places….the more you feel this truth, the faster it will come.”
Then, it dawned on me…this is the type of mentality we must also have when it comes to manifestation, or the expectation of creating miracles in our lives. If we don’t look for those miracles to show, they just won’t! It takes practice to think in this manner and to expect the universe to send us what we need or desire. The same should be true for seeing solutions rather than problems. So, if it takes practice to have this become a learned behavior and see results, why not practice it! That’s what I’ve decide to do “religiously” for one week. Maybe you can join me on my one week challenge to be completely and forcibly solutions focused?? Let’s have some fun!
My Plan.
- Expect the unexpected. I shall write this on my mirror and in my office so that I see it throughout the day.
- Play detective. If solutions exist before problems, then I must search for them like a detective! (I’m having fun already!)
- Play catch. I must pay keen attention to these so called “problems” that I and others around me encounter. I will catch myself and them in the act!
- Keep track. I will keep a journal and jot down immediately the identified challenge and the solution that I have found.
- Start a revolution! I will share my results with you and others (see below) and launch a wave of solution thinking!
Let’s begin!
Here’s what I found…
Interestingly enough, the week began with what most would consider a major problem…my husband parting ways with his job and his career of 15+ years with no foreseeable income in sight. Overnight I have become the sole bread earner for our family. Pressure? Not really! This so-called challenge is providing me with the best of the best opportunities to practice what I preach—to think thoughts of abundance and gratitude and TRUST that our family will be taken care of and that we will receive all that we need exactly when we need it. I am frighteningly calm.
The second part of this first, very real challenge is that my husband now has the chance to fulfill a life-long passion of his, which is to pursue a career in the scuba diving industry. He is jumping into the abyss of entrepreneurship and without an iota of “lack” in his mind or vocabulary he is leaping in with tremendous joy and passion. I love to see people take risks; to pursue and live their dreams. My support he must have. This is the solution that I found.
My detective work continued thoroughly throughout the week and my journal filled with problems and solutions. Things that disrupted my days and my pre-planning, things that made my ego rage and incidents for me and those around me that provided instant occasions for learning. By Thursday I had absolutely no interest in being this detective any longer. Why? When I read through my list of so-called problems I realized how these things we call problems are simply distractions…things that take us away from our intended plans and cause frustration if we allow them to. They no longer were problems for me and I was happy with that realization.
The most important lesson I have learned this week is that we truly cannot sweat the small stuff. Yes, life will throw us some really big and difficult problems, but if we truly choose to believe that the universe only sends us problems because the solution was created first, then we have no problems, yes? I love this thought and I choose to believe and live this thought. I am at peace.
Speaking of peace…I feel the powers at hand sent me a nice gift this past week; a gentle reminder that life is about balance and trust…about ying and yang. As I was brushing my teeth and staring at my beautifully tiled bathroom I noticed what looked to be a ying/yang sign naturally created in my stone. I couldn’t help but giggle. Here is a photo of it.
I expected the unexpected, and that is what I received.
I choose to be at peace and to trust that we will be taken care of.
Only solutions exist.
May you have a month filled with peace, light and blessings,
Monique
Finding Home: 10 ways to recharge your soul
June 23, 2009
Nahant Simplified
It’s always fun to spend time in the Boston, MA area, where my husband grew up. More specifically, he was raised in Malden, where his parents still reside. Even though Boston is not my home, it “feels like home” if you know what I mean. In fact, when I travelled there with my husband (my boyfriend at the time) for the first time in 1994 it was meeting his parents and extended family that sealed the deal for me. Family was everything for them. We still joke that one of the similarities between our families (mine: Cuban; his: Irish/Italian) is that we all are so family oriented (and love to dance!). We both love spending time with our family members.
It wasn’t until our trip this June 2009 that I really got to thinking how going home was a way of “plugging in” for my husband—recharging his battery, especially since we don’t visit as often as we used to. The things we do when we are in Boston are things that for him are essential to charging his spiritual energy. It goes something like this…
- Arrive at Logan and be greeted by Mom and Dad.
- Tune into the local stations for “the best music ever”.
- Come home to homemade chicken wings, meatballs and sausage in “gravy”, and homemade pizza (among many other delicious goodies).
- Sit out on the deck with the lighted palm tree decoration and drink a few cold ones (usually Sam Adams) and talk about “the days” while taking in the cool air.
- NEXT DAY…the itch begins…we must go to Nahant (40 Steps) to see, hear and touch the ocean. This is the place where my husband’s dreams were born—his love for the ocean, what’s underneath the ocean, and scuba diving.
- Having a Maine lobster or “lobsta” roll.
You get the idea. The list continues for us…a check-off of sorts of things to do (whale watching, seeing old friends, a Sox or Pats game, etc.) before we head back home. This time, however, I noticed how truly important these activities are to my husband, as small as they may seem. It’s almost like he’s on a mission—quiet, yet excited; eager, yet meditative, until he’s filled his cup. These are things “of the soul” that keep him charged so he can go back to his “adult life home” in Miami and get back to living. During our trips, I know not to say “no” or ask “why”—it’s clear that it is something he truly needs, an hourglass that continually empties and needs to be filled again.
And isn’t it the same for us all? I compared my husband’s experience to my own and I do believe that there are times in our lives that we all must reconnect and fill our souls so that we can continue on our journeys. For me, since I live in my home town, it’s more about connecting with those things about my life’s experiences that were meaningful to me and helped to make me who I am today, like spending quality time at least once a year with my middle school girlfriends, eating my favorite childhood meal or dessert when I feel I need “soul food” (arroz con pollo and arroz con leche—yum!), listening to music that reminds me of the “old times” especially the music my mom played, driving through my grandparent’s old neighborhood (Little Havana), etc.
So why not plug in when we need it? We all need to recharge at different times, perhaps when we are feeling a bit disconnected, unfulfilled, or when things just seem a bit mundane. What is it about these experiences that recharge us? It seems to me that the feelings we are trying to reconnect with are those of love, belonging, familiarity, comfort and excitement. So when you need a dose of these feelings, here are at least 10 ways you can recharge your soul:
- Take a trip! If it’s been a while since you’ve visited your home town, why not take a few days and make that trip. Or, if taking a trip is not a possibility, how about picking up the phone and having a nice conversation with a loved one? If you live in your home town, why don’t you take the time to visit with a relative you hardly ever speak with or see? Web cams provide another great way to connect with those you love and/or miss.
- Girls/Boys Night Out! Same concept here, but with your childhood or close friends. Even if it’s for a few hours, schedule a dinner or cocktail with one or more of your close friends you don’t get to see too often. Reminisce and catch up. Have a few laughs!
- Have some soul food! Gosh… there is nothing like some good soul food! If you can’t actually make it out to that favorite restaurant or to your mom’s house where she can whip up your favorite dish, how about making it yourself or ordering out? It’s the feeling of eating the special dish that you’re after, so eat up and leave the guilt at the door.
- Visit that favorite place. For my husband that place was Nahant. What is it for you? Can’t visit? How about find a photo, frame it and hang it up in your home or office?
- Rent a movie. We all have that favorite flick that get’s us going. For me, it’s either Grease or Footloose. I have very distinct memories of reenacting these movies in front of my living room wall-to-floor mirror! What movie makes your energy soar?
- Turn up the dial! Does music lift your spirits like it does for me? What songs from your childhood/youth do the same for you? Find them and play them.
- Scrap. Photos have a way of instantly creating that connection once again. If you’re anything like me, you probably have many boxes stored and filled with photos from childhood and up. Why not sort through them, pick a few favorites that recreate those feelings you crave and create a scrap book? It also feels good to create photo albums or scrap books for others.
- Blog. There’s no better way to reconnect these days than through the internet. If you have not yet connected with those dear friends or relatives on Facebook, you can always use a blogging tool, like Blogger or WordPress to create a personal blog to keep you connected with your family and friends. You can share photos and keep everyone up-to-date on your life’s happenings.
- Take up a hobby. This doesn’t have to be too time consuming; a simple game can do the trick. What board game did you play with your relatives or friends that made you smile? How long has it been since you played it? Dust it off and get going. Or, was there something you truly enjoyed doing that you wouldn’t mind doing again, like playing an instrument, or taking a dance class. I’m all for finding some time to do those activities that create excitement and purpose for me. What are they for you?
- Journal or write a letter. Writing can be a soothing and healing process for many. When our lives are too hectic and we long to create or connect with something more meaningful, jotting down our thoughts, remembering experiences that put smiles on our faces, listing those things we are grateful for today, or writing a letter to someone who we miss dearly or appreciate can send our energy right back up again. Purchase a simple, beautiful journal—one that calls out to you—and give it a try.
Remembering the past doesn’t always mean living in it. It’s important to make that distinction as I’m a believer in living in the moment. This brings to mind Daughtry’s song “Home” where he says… “I’m going home, to a place where I belong, where your love has always been enough for me.” Going home means different things to different people. For some it is literal and for others, a cup of coffee, a song, or a conversation can create that feeling that will put us back in balance and provide us with some needed energy to keep moving forward in our lives with a sense of meaning and with a smile on our faces.
What creates that feeling of home for you? Add to my list! I’d love to hear your thoughts.
All my love to our family and friends in Boston who always make us feel at home!
With gratitude,
Monique
Lessons from the Potty
May 19, 2009
You can do it, Princess!Turn up the Happiness!
April 13, 2009
This month I’ve been pondering happiness. What does being “happy” really mean and how can we be happy more often? In fact, how can we be conscious enough to know exactly when we need to turn it up and make it more present? After lots of thought, including looking at my own happiness patterns, I believe it is possible to switch it on at a moments notice. (I don’t know that I’m capable of believing otherwise, but many of you probably know that about me by now! 🙂 )
So, what are those things that tend to turn down our happiness or keep it at bay? There are certain things that may be unique for each of us, but for the most part, these may be some of the culprits:
· Stress
· Conflict
· Overwhelm
· Sudden change
· Loneliness
· Loss or grief
· Poor health
· Financial distress
You get the picture, and I’m sure you can add more items to this list. The specifics behind the culprit may not even be that drastic and yet still can bring us into a state of unhappiness. For example, today I woke up feeling a bit under the weather. It took every ounce of energy I had to force myself to get to work. Needless to say, by the time I got home with my energetic four year old, I was a bit frazzled and ready for a break. On a scale from 1 to 10, one being the weakest and 10 the strongest, my “Happy Quotient” (HQ) was about a 6. When I stood in silence for a brief moment to observe the state of my home (the cleaning lady could not come today!!) and how I was feeling, I about lost it. My mind chatter grew stronger and stronger as I realized how chaotic my environment was and how much work I would need to put into my home to get it back to a normal enough state where I could relax and enjoy my time with my daughter and later with my son and husband. My HQ quickly dropped to about a 4. I was upset, not feeling up to par, and not wanting (at all!) to clean up and organize.
How do we pick ourselves up quickly and turn up our HQ? Well, here’s a simple to remember tool that I whipped up that may work for you. And, it happens to be called “H.A.P.P.Y”! Ask yourself one or more of the following questions when you feel your HQ dropping quickly, and see it rise just in time to put you back into an optimal state.
Hope – How can I be hopeful right now? When we feel frazzled and unhappy, most of the time our mind chatter spirals down into dark, negative thoughts. Instead of thinking “There is no hope for this house today. My weekend will be ruined because I’m going to have to spend all my time cleaning, and then I’ll be exhausted and will have no energy to do anything!”….we should instead question—“Where’s the hope in this situation? It looks like I will need to do the dishes, wash a few loads of laundry, and organize the toys. If I break up these tasks throughout the weekend, including getting one out of the way right now, I should be able have the kind of weekend I envisioned!” See the difference? The moment you shift your thoughts from despair to hope, your feelings follow right along and pick you up.
Acceptance & Appreciation – How can accepting this situation help me? What about this situation can I be grateful for? I threw in two “A”s for this one, because I feel they are equally important. In Eckhart Tolle’s A New Earth, Tolle explains the power of “awakened doing”, that is, being fully engaged (conscious) in what you are doing. According to Tolle there are three modalities of awakened doing: (1) acceptance, (2) enjoyment, and (3) enthusiasm. Each one represents a certain vibrational frequency of consciousness. In essence, at least one of these needs to be operating at all times whenever you are engaged in doing anything. If not, then we are most likely creating suffering for ourselves and others, or unhappiness. Tolle concludes this idea by saying that “On the surface, acceptance looks like a passive state, but in reality it is active and creative because it brings something entirely new into the world”—peace, subtle energy and surrendered action. So, in moments where you have no desire to be joyful or enthusiastic, employ acceptance and you’ll be bringing peace and surrender to the situation.
Here’s another example to make this more clear. Let’s say I decided that doing the dishes would alleviate some of my stress. So, instead of cursing the act of doing the dishes, therefore adding more negativity to my mood, I can accept the chore and bring more peace to myself and the situation. Make sense? Please comment if it doesn’t and we can chat more about this.
What about appreciation? There is an opportunity in everything—both good and bad. Ponder upon what’s conflicting you and brainstorm about what good can come from it, or what learning may be behind it. I challenge you to find the opportunities behind these issues that bring you down. Using the same example, I realized that my problem seemed much larger than it was because I was not feeling well. I also became very grateful for the dirty dishes and laundry because I knew that many others didn’t even have a home in which to live. Grateful I became quickly!
Patience – How can I bring patience to the situation? Is it realistic to drive up your emotions when some things are not within your control? In my case, do I need to do everything right now? What can wait? Feeling sick was not within my control, and therefore, it may suit me (and everyone in my family!) to get some rest before tackling these tasks.
Let’s say you had an argument with your significant other and are very eager to state your feelings and get the conflict resolved. If you are angry in the moment, how do you think the conversation will go? Would it be better to create some space between your intended discussion to think of what and how you will communicate to him/her? Patience provides this space, and most of the time, a more positive outcome.
Perseverance – How can I persist; rise above? Some situations that keep us from feeling happy are difficult and may not be resolved as quickly as we’d like. For example, perhaps you are dealing with a very sick relative and you are anticipating their loss. The feeling of loss is one that can easily permeate throughout all areas of your life. Understanding what healing you can bring to the situation and creating within you a feeling of fight and survival can really pull you through. We may not know what the outcome will be, but wouldn’t it feel better to intend a positive result? Perseverance can lift our spirits, and therefore our HQ, because we are fighting for something that is worth our time and attention, regardless of how negative it may seem in the moment. Remember, when the going gets tough, the tough get going!
You! – How are YOU responsible for your unhappiness? This is my favorite. The key to happiness is within each of us…its power is within YOU! We have all heard this before, but it is always worth repeating and believing it—the only person that can make you happy is YOU. We must take personal responsibility for our thoughts, feelings and actions. Understanding how our thoughts often sink us is important. YOU create your thoughts…so create powerful and empowering thoughts in every moment for many happy moments!
Interestingly enough, you also can do something as simple as smiling to lift your spirits. Oprah magazine (May 2009) has a great article about happiness. In it, the author explains how when we smile or even sigh (release), our Vagus nerve is working behind the scenes to reduce our heart rate and calm our immune response. Cool! No wonder smiling feels good.
Additionally, the article sites the importance of the hormone Oxytocin, which releases when we do things like watch sentimental commercials or laugh at funny tv shows. It is the hormone that uplifts us. Ahh! Evidence that we can do nothing— sit on the couch, eat popcorn, and watch funny movies ,or cry at heart tugging commercials!
So, although happiness can be explained scientifically (via the Vagus Nerve and the creation of Oxytocin) and we can cause it by smiling and laughing, we also can drive happiness in our lives by paying close attention to our thoughts— changing them, and acting upon our new, powerful thoughts.
What new thoughts and actions will you create for your life today? I’d love to hear from you!
In closing, here’s a great quote that is woven into a beautiful dish towel that my amazing friend Lou gifted to me recently—“Life isn’t about finding yourself, it’s about creating yourself!”
Now, smile, laugh, and go create your fabulous, HAPPY life!
Monique
Let It Flow
March 10, 2009
Just recently I had the pleasure of going to Aruba for my husband’s President’s Club Trip (an incentive trip via his company). It was only a weekend trip, yet I was so thrilled to be experiencing some much needed rest and fun in a place I had never visited. My whistle was wet, but I wanted more!
This trip reminded me of last year’s incentive trip to Cabo San Lucas, which was magical. It was during this trip that I made the decision (and my husband agreed!) that it would be a goal of ours to go on as many mini-vacations as possible, even if they were only in Florida. Our children are at an age where they, too, will enjoy and learn from visiting places outside of their home city…out of their routine.
When we came back from Cabo I worked with my coach to create my Life Plan. This is a carefully crafted document, with vision, passion, love, and excitement poured into it! What a fun exercise! I took the time to design the life I wanted to experience 25 years from now, and in addition, the steps or actions that I wanted to see myself complete within 10, 5 and 1 year(s) from now in order to fulfill that vision.
Within my short range plan (one year), one of the actions that had so much positive energy surrounding it was my goal to “take as many mini-trips” as possible…maximum one per month. It wasn’t until my close friend Mal made a comment on my Facebook profile that I, too, realized that my intention—my request of the universe was coming to fruition. Mal’s comment was something like this…”Mo, I remember you telling me that you wanted to take a lot of little trips this year and you’re doing it…you’re living the ‘the secret!’”
Wow! She was right! For those of you who have studied the Law of Attraction, or felt motivated by The Secret or previously published books relating to manifesting your desires into reality, this personal example may come in handy for you! Because of our day-to-day responsibilities and busy thoughts and actions, it can be so easy to miss when your dreams are coming true. Mal’s message to me was my gift for that day, because it helped me to be grateful for my many blessings, and it reminded me that you can achieve what you wish for.
The first thought that came to me was “I had so much positive energy surrounding this goal that I let it go…gave it to the universe to make it happen…and simply accepted the gifts as they came.” My friends, it doesn’t get much easier than this. We can continue to read books, listen to lectures, ask for advice, but the proof is in the pudding! The moment you truly allow yourself to Ask, Believe, and Receive and Trust that it will come to pass, the rest is easy and the stress is removed. And what is the rest, you ask? Ahhh…it’s the best part…living in the moment!
Let me reference an amazing CD I recently listened to, which my divine friend Lynn let me borrow (love ya girl!). It’s called The Astonishing Power of Emotions by Esther and Jerry Hicks. They are the authors of “Ask and It Is Given.” The link provided here is from one of their talks shown on YouTube. I cannot even come close to perfectly delivering their message, but I shall try to synthesize the thought quickly and as best as I can. Here I go…
According to the Hicks (or Abraham, as they refer to themselves), our lives are like a stream and everything we want—our desires; what we hope to manifest or receive—is downstream. However, due to our human nature to work, work, work, and try, try, try, and fight, fight, fight for what we want we tend to row against the stream’s current and violently row our oars to go upstream. We are resisting the current that naturally wants to take us downstream and give us what we desire. We often tell ourselves that people only get what they want when they work so hard to get it, but according to the Law of Attraction, nothing that we want is upstream…not one!
According to Abraham the stream will continue to flow all of our lives, and will flow faster and faster as we continue to create and fight for our desires. Yet, when we release our oars and let the current take us downstream, that is when we feel a sense of relief and we are in vibrational sync with that which we desire.
Abraham asks, “How long do you want to wait to get what you want?” Not long at all if you just go with the flow. When you do you are reaching for the positive feeling of having that which you desire and the current is taking you in that direction. When you fight, fight, fight upstream and create upstream thoughts, like “I don’t have it yet and I need it to be happy!” you are focused only on what you don’t have and may be missing opportunities that float right by you. Yet, when you go with the flow…Ask and Believe…then you will notice these gifts and the Receiving will come much faster.
Let’s stop battling the current of our own intentions!
Take some time to think about those things you want to manifest in your life and create the feeling deep inside of how you will feel when you have them. Feel it now, and let it go; go with the flow and let it come to you.
Do you have examples of how receiving gifts from the universe came faster and felt better when you didn’t fight so hard to get it? I’d love to hear about your experiences.
Let me close with a message of gratitude (from my Daily Kabbalah Tune Up)–so important to the exercise of living in the now and receiving what we are divinely ordered to receive. This message was actually delivered on my birthday, March 6, and I was very grateful for that! Here it is:
Friday, March 6
The power of miracles is available to us at every moment. There are many practical steps you can take to connect with this power. They all involve finding excitement and beauty in the permanent and lasting gifts of the Creator.
-Begin the day with gratitude
-Realize that life itself is a miracle.
-Recognize the precision and wonder of nature.
-Seek the Light in every person you meet.
-Identify the Light in all things.
Exercise these five steps today and you will have the power of miracles on your side. Create the unthinkable – for yourself, for your loved ones, and for the world.
Wishing you daily miracles,
Monique
Heaven on Earth
February 15, 2009
This month, I have been given subtle messages by several “messengers”, to pay attention to how I can become more rooted, connected to our world and others around me. Simply, how I can be more of an Earth Angel. As I sit here and type this message, I’m actually amazed at how I caught on to these “messages”. I’m patting myself on the back (I am, really! 🙂 ) for listening to my intuition, which I blogged about last month.
More on the messages and messengers further along…
You’ve heard this term before—Earth Angel—yes? And, I bet you can even sing the song. Yet, have you pondered what truly is an Earth Angel? It was quite funny how I came to think about it. Last week my neighborhood association hosted an Art Fair in our park and I volunteered for a few hours. I recognized one of the vendors who was walking in my direction and we spoke for a few minutes. We lived on the same block growing up, and played together often. Her cousin, who at the time lived a few homes away as well, is still one of my very best friends still today. Although I had no intention of visiting the vendors or purchasing anything, I did want to stop by her table to see her craft.
Lilly’s business is www.BagRevolution.com, and she creates earth friendly shopping bags with cute sayings on them. Yes, you must visit her site! It just so happened that I had wanted to purchase a few of these bags so that I could do my part to be eco-friendly. It takes a village, right? I believe it does. So, the first one that caught my attention said “Earth Angel”. Immediately I said, “Okay, give me three of those and one of the other.” In fact, I told Lilly that I believed I was an Earth Angel. She may still be wondering what I meant! I was thrilled with my purchase and set my new bags in my kitchen, and began using one as my paper recycling “bin”. Lilly was Messenger #2.
Fast forward to this week…
I received an invitation from the local chapter of my coaching institute to hear from a “Peace Pilgrim”, a young man who has dedicated his life to traveling from community to community (wherever he is invited to go) to learn and teach principles of peace and love. While the topic seemed interesting, I did not pay too much attention to it at first. I already had a commitment that evening, and it would have been a long day for me. Yet, the more the days went on I received a stronger calling to attend. So I did. This man was quite intriguing. You just don’t meet people like this every day!
I would not be able to do his vision justice unless I shared verbatim everything he discussed with us on this night, but I will try to sum it up in one paragraph. Scaughdt (“scot”) is the principal founder of (i)am—Inspiring the Altruistic Moment (www.inspiringthealtruisticmoment.com). He shared with us two workbooks he had created for his “Re-Discovering Peace” three-day workshop, which had just adjourned a few hours prior. He only shared two of the major concepts in the workbook, but the message was clear and deep for me.
In essence, Scaughdt’s talk was one of detailing the path of self-reactualization—how we—those of us on earth—can move closer and closer to spirit through our thoughts, emotions and actions. He showed us a very complex diagram that detailed, based on his first-hand knowledge and experience living in this fashion, how we can move through and up this path by lovingly choosing to do for others (putting others needs first) as often as possible. He describes that “shift” as jumping from Truth to Virtue, that is, being a “Virtue Walker” (walking your talk) instead of a “Truth Seeker” (simply searching for deeper meaning). He believes that we reach enlightenment and contentment in the exact moment we decide to choose love and peace and oneness over fear and ego and selfishness. We have hundreds of these “moments” to consciously make this decision each day. Ahhh, I definitely met an Earth Angel and clearly saw in my mind and felt in my heart those moments when I had been an Earth Angel too. Scaughdt was Messenger #3.
Now, I’m taking you back to the first week of February, when I had the opportunity to meet a like-minded individual. I was in a work meeting with one of our board members, when we had a moment to talk candidly about the economy, work, personal development, etc. I shared with him my new coaching business and my desire to align myself more closely with individuals who “speak my language” as well as those who I can help along the way. He shared that his wife, too, was “on this path” and happened to be working at the university as well.
So, just a few days later his wife and I were having coffee on campus talking about our interests, sharing experiences, and feeling “at home”. Just before our conversation ended she felt the need to share with me an organization developed by Deepak Chopra, one of my favorite authors. She felt that being aligned with them would be something I would benefit from and would provide me an avenue to share with others the work I was doing. She also mentioned that she did not see this organization’s presence in Miami.
It did not take me long to look up the Alliance for a New Humanity (ANH). And when I did, I too noticed that it did not have a Miami Chapter. I thought to myself, “Why not take this opportunity to help lead a global effort for creating transformation right here in my own backyard?” That day, ANH Miami was born. My mother, Ellie, who has always been my like-minded spiritual partner, has joined me as co-founder of ANH Miami. I invite you to learn more about ANH by visiting our group website: http://anhglobal.ning.com/group/anhmiami. You may join this group as well as our group on Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/home.php?#/group.php?gid=124729195553. We hope to begin organizing our first discussion soon. Tatiana was Messenger #1.
It was in this moment, when I was thinking about what to blog on, that my eyes became fixated on my new Earth Angel grocery bag. Instantly my thoughts were filled with these meetings and conversations that seem to have created a theme for my month of February—“How could I be more of an Earth Angel more often”?
So, next time you pick up a book that you feel will help you on your quest to seek a deeper meaning in life, why not heed Scaughdt’s advice and just go out and give of yourself from the heart. If we each get out of our own way, spread our wings, and engage in random acts of kindness, we will, together, be creating a New Humanity.
Many blessings,
Monique
Illumined Life Leadership 